Blah Blah

I know for the recent days i am working towards on concentrating and ultimately i am
getting the touch of that.Today i felt better relaxed and tried to fix one issue andits almost done still have some more to do.Worked for the organ doantion campaign
and wrote a poem on that to give them.Still i feel a bit tired .I am not enjoying work rather than i am doing that as a commitment.Using less words when speaking to others.I am feeling that actions and deeds speaks louder than words.have to maintain the same spirit.I feel hazzle free without words.feeling the inner calmness sometimes and its rebelliousness against the composed.My mind nowadays thinking of a
job of high integrity responsible jobs like serving people but i have to learn the basics of the game.Keeping my word and commitment.

All Work ...

This week i am totally involved in work and with full focus i am learning to do independently in work that gives me satisfaction as well as pain in times of not happening.Thats ok thats life.I am correcting the mistake i have dome so far.
With my cube1 friend the chats are friendly one and relaxing in times of boredom.
Bored in the evening though of leaving after confused with which task to do and resolved the confusion after go with the initial problem.As usua i talked with my finacee.I can feel the commitment with her .In my life style to concentrate on work i am sacrificing joy in the work place for my own sake and to be compliant with the old rugs.
Going to home.
Have to take food.

Day of learning

This day is a friday ... i am feeling the relaxation in friday like before ..it means i am not enjoying the work i do.In the next environment i want to be professional sort ..concentrating on only work and committment i should keep that in full control not breaking any superiors commitment due to my personal commitment.The remedy is have to clearly communicate with the superiors to avoid these probelm.
I went for wedding card selection and my mom told that we can buy in our home town itself.Yesterday i felt irritation due to excessive noice in bus.
Today i am going to meet my love ...waiting for some days for this...
and then tommorrow morning i will go home.
Yeah have to go to tanishq showroom to my mom ,after closing two prs and got a good learning in my work.

pretty challenging day

Today the work was pretty challenging ..and have gone through half way.
Going to choose my wedding card ..
then see you later ..
i am in a hurry.

Work and work only

Now a days i am having no fun at work...work become serious business.
It good actually i am able enough to focus in work ..
I want to follow this in the coming days also.
Closed six defects,two more than expected..who cares about what others say,
i care about what i do ...
its really good to focus on the work than the other parts....

ok enough about work.
Played TableTennis for somewhile i can say the continuation of focus to that also.
played some good shots.

then my roomie is so impatient he is not able to understand others circunstance at all.Gave some sharp reply when he is impatient.If he shows to me thats fine but when
he also try to apply the same to my girl through me is not acceptable.

Then have to move on ...
Tommorrow i have to study more chapters ...
Feeling like to eat something tasty and less.

let me get ready to play the game plan for future at the same time living in the present....

karmic cycle follows

Studied in the morning.I am planning for a better future.It will work out.But the time is the factor we have to consider.
Then i cane to office after talking with my love and discussed with my manager and HR
about relocation of the project.I tried to stay near ambattur and kilpauk.

Every action done has their won equal and opposire reaction,I can feel the cause and affect of my actions in my work.Little worried waht next even then i havent allowed anything to divide me.
Today i worked well focusedly .Did bug fixing and requested to update the FS.
Enough today i feel now.
Going early today mean 7:30 pm

Planning for a better future

morning started with the voices of the past ..
then i made up my to be stay in conscious mode.
chopped onions and helped my sister in cooking,I found kitchen
is the nice bonding place to grow relationship with my mother and sister
Had a good sleep and food in the after noon
Talked with my fiancee.No tension at all felt very relaxing after the
sleep and played football in the evening,What i analysed in the game is i am not palying for the goal that reflects in my life also
i am just making passes acts as a good team player but not a star palyer.
will be a star palyer in every sort.
Teached mathu about cryptography for her diploma project.

Went to church and the message was eternal hope.
Jesus won the death the word was inspiring ...to me death was worries and
hopelessness at this point.To my ablity i want to win worry and hopeless ness
Planning for a better future.
updated the resume and sent to many friends.
Have to go to office tommorrow

This day i am in my hometown,Still i am thinking about the past.that is yesterday .My friend and fiancee and encouraging me a lot .And 90% i am out of that .So what ? is my question to them and i feel them as a mad crowd running for what they deserve ...some people have madness for money, some people have madness
for fame ,some people have their madness for love...May be my desire to live life doesnt match with their unbalanced way of life.Working for something that will not bring happines and their wellbeing.So I am out of the Box..Here I am i am going to work to live life and i will have commitment towards the thing i feel life.
So far here in home i had a good food with fish fry and went to my fiancee home.In the morning i went to church to meet father for catechism study and he was not there in the morning and i went again in the evening and he took class related to god..One thing which resides in my mind is ,if you want to reach god ,among fellow humans and accepting humans as you friend .submission to the will of god
leads to grace in life.I dont know about god but i know goodness can be reached in this life rather than believing in kingdom that is in heaven.
And there after watched Vijay TV, the dance show and i started to believe in will of god and the peoples prejudice about others.In the evening talked to my brother about my problem in office.Is that a problem i think now ... good thinking
My ego says like that.Identifying myself with that office creates this pain and i am going to withdraw that.Going to choose a nearest office of transportability that will make my life comfartable.
To make myself to feel good I was telling to myself that I am High potential.Self Thinking is very important in the making
and breaking of myself .Whatever you think is what you are.I have to take care of my mothers health.

Dont love your company love your job

This is what i learned today when i manager told that i am not fit enough for their
requirement .THey may be true to their opinion ..its good for me ,i am going shift to some other company to create my own new self ...Happily agreed later after initial hesitation and questioning why they suuposed to do.The reason is i am not in time to deliver.Ok great ..Go ahead its life ...

day of peaceful mental state without instant fruit

Today i was pretty cool in work from the morning .in the afternoon i took a nap for half an hour in desk itself.There after i felt a complete peace of mind .
I worked on issue and found the root cause which i tried to fix ,but still havent worked to reach that its taking time though i focussed fully .May be i am not going in the right direction it seems .Will have to work tomorrow and will finish that.
That what my work end though drained in work still feeling stable and happy ..
now a days i am not feeling for what i cant. a good attitude is nt(:)).

In organisation's social front, designed a teaser for organ donation camp ... pretty good design and karthik R helped me out and another csc member called me up to inform the date that is Apr 7 in our facility ..

called my home asked about taking license there in my hometown.

personally i am not revealing everything happening between me and my fiancee ,were feeling very intimate ..obviously and i will live a commited and trustful life towards her in all circumstance.

have to go homemmy apartment here ...
bye bye ..
feeling wakeful since i slept in the afternoon ..but i am not going to work..
ok bye ..
Have to take printouts for my roommate.
have to eat well and after talking i will sleep

Atlast an happy ending in my work today ..

My Morning started around 7:50 itself i waked up after the voices in head started its job .i stopped them there itself and came out to live.
I made myself that i will Think with alertness rather than thought running into my head ... Is that i attended that thinking mode perfectly to some extent ...
In the morning itself i planned on my task prioritisation ..

1.Community service activity
I did satisfying campaign in mail about organ donation ...well done my boy :)
2.Closing some PR
Succeded atleast in one pr .tomorrow i can do another
3.Working on my Development
It was not that easy today ... i did lot of working .i felt my lead was little impatience today though he helped me ..who cares about his patience if i dont know
where else shall i go rather than reinventing the wheels on my won..
After a long time after solving the db records issue..reinitialized everything
it worked well after deploying in a new machine ...
Atlast the unexpected other operation in the dialog also worked well
tomorrow i have to work on the tool dialog.
An happy ending atlast at work...
In between i talked with my fiancee ..pretty relaxing when i talked with her .. i felt her to talk .
yeah here after have to update my poem blog and time to say bye bye ...

a day of less focus

today it was a peaceful wakeup ..slept well last night ...
after waking up called up my girl and talked for sometime (one hour is sometime eh :) ?)..
enjoyed the music of illayaraja nothing but wind ...esp Do nothing track i like the flute track ..high pitch violin needs mental stamina i feel...
later came back to office ...
in work its not that much smooth ..very dull both mentally as well as physically..some of issue in getting the server bean itself ,had problem in deployment..so the fast is not pretty good in work...
in between a small misunderstanding with my Cube2mate to install the server which i use ..i have another 2 cubemate ..
oneto one HR meeting was also there ..told everything as satisfied except package she told that she is not called on that scope ..
Things got done feeled satisfied after things worked well ..

..blogged a poem in tamil
at the end of the day right now i am signing off to home...
wishing to eat some tasty food for the supper in the hotel..
bye ...





working harder to meet the commitment

came back to office from home town

I became a weekly flyer to home town, the gist of this day is every enjoyable moment with my fiancee ...took a nap in the after noon...its a 2 hr sleep ...very tired and my eyes got heavy so took that to manage working ... and in work started very boringly abd got heat up ..chatted with malai kannan ...and have to go home now
time is 11:00 ...a long eventful day

today i did a லோட் ...

today i did a lot of work in office continously as usually enjoying my work ...
side by side talking with my cubicle mate whenever necessary ..
its been really fun to talk with anyone... may be i transformed myself into fun kind rather than the nothing in this world and dreaming beyond on a fantacy world of nowhere..

i told that yesterday i implemented a db bean and today i implemented that in my ui of the product so far .. so god ..it drained some my grey cells any way that makes life interesting...now i will get a dreamless sleep out of that ...

when did i woked up 8:00 yeah
took bath ..talked to my fiance.. morning attendance :) ...very sensitive talk about my father ... yeah who died recently out of cancer :( its life man ...come out of that ...

ok then came office around 10:30 itself thats early itself and as i told yesterday
my hope is not in vain i got leave for tommorrow ...going to home towm from chennai..
for easter ... happy easter to you all...

what else ..
went to shopping to buy toys for my niece
great .. happy feeling that i am able to add some joy to their little happy world ..
great going ...

ok will be sleeping at 12:00
now time is already 10:48
good night india
for other distance locale have a nice day...
bye bye ...

The First blog

Usually i write blogs onpoem, this is the first time i write a blog about myself that too as a public diary so it will compel me to write on a daily basis .This will be a whole lot of words of junk for some people ,for some people it will be like peeping into another life and some one it will be teaching its the way you take...obviously if you are reading its for you ... you can take it or reject it and i will be to know your reaction to me in comments..
ok come to my life ...
Todays event
wake up around: 7:30
In the morning itself started with a little bit of meditation,dont judge based on this that i am spiritual ..thats true but i have my other part as well, a bit living the world right now ..
around 8:45 pm
took bath and noticed the bathroom door .....shhhhh
the provacation starts ...
my roomie is my reformer about my forgetfulness,he pasted a white paper to switch off the
rest room light and there came the anger ...who is this guy who sees minute details ...let him see the log in his eye ..... phew my god... and i changed the pasted paper into a game like here after
please enter that date i miss that in that way i was a bit happy that i have returned something in my own sort....

Went to the neightbourhood granma and grandpa of age more that 80's still going strong ...
let then live long.... above 10 min i stayed there until the water boy came to put the bubbletop
mineral water bottle inm y room.
In office
where-- in a software company
when--came around 10:30
It was a decent day now a days everyday is good for me...
went very well with initial issue and started the bean implementation
2:30 - 3:40
where-went to the opp office block
whats more important is i went to the commited, social service council in my org and i am very happy that i am actively participating atleast in the meeting ..have to show more energy in the upcoming project related to that ...
after that
at the EOB i have done bean implementation and its perfectly working and i got a lot of learning its new to me and UTD for my feature also(if you can't undersrtand this terminilogy plz ignore)done and between that my fiancee(yeah i am going too marry in a month) also called me really love is holding the knife boss ...its upto you which edge you handle....she told to go early arnd 9:00 now after all commitments its 10:00 now ...
i asked for leave for this good friday hope i will get that...surely i will get .. i will argue with my manager :)
what tonight will call my fiancee talk to her upto 12:00 pm and will sleep then ..
Time to say bye bye ...
meet you tommorrow :)